Boundary
by x.lithium
Summary: MustangHawkeye; A collection of Royai drabbles. CHAPTER THREE; KILL; But when Roy pressed her roughly against the door, she realized it didn't matter if the entire universe asked her to do its bidding. If this one man asked her to shoot, she would kill.
1. Fragment

_For T, because you're the brightest thing I've got. _

**FRAGMENT  
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On most nights like this, when the sky let it snow long enough that the streets of Central hid under layers of snow, Roy would drive Riza home. This night, he did not. She couldn't blame him, even as the cold water found its way into her military issued boots and the snow from the sky seeped into her scarf. She couldn't blame him, not when they'd just lost Hughes. Admittedly, Maes' death had been hard on her too. Irritating as they were, Hughes' endless rambles about his daughter and wife did have a calming effect to them.

She had seen Roy, then.

'He must be cold', had been her first thought, as she'd seen her Roy standing in the middle of the path, wearing only a thin white dress shirt and his military pants. The snowflakes swirled around him almost coyly, as if delighting in the prospect of burying him under its weight.

Roy was not an incoherent drunk. She had learnt that the first time she had seen him drink. He never stumbled on words, nor did he falter in his thoughts like most people. Riza almost could have sworn his truest thoughts only escaped the confines of his deepest mind when he was drunk.

"What do you _want_? To take all that I've got? You're horrible, you know that? You never show yourself, yet you're in _every single little_ moment!" His eyes showed the skies defiance. It had always been a habit of his, speaking to the skies as if he could demand the Gods to descend down to Earth. He yelled Maes' name to the darkness, as if that could maybe make his existence real once more.

"Where are you, huh? _Where are you_? Everything's _falling apart_, and where are you now, God?" Roy raised his arms and Riza froze as she caught a glimpse of the desperation in his eyes. He paused, fingers reaching towards unforgiving heavens, the bare trees by his side echoeing his plea, their branches raised to unresponsive skies. He lowered his arms, then. "I believe in you, you know. _I believe-_" Roy's voice cracked as he broke off, "Can't you just answer my prayers? I- I'm still lost. _We're_ still lost. But I believe_."_ He looked straight at her, then. _"I believe."_

He had always shown himself to her in pieces, and she had always accepted him. No matter which fragment of himself he offered to her. There was nothing he could show her of himself that she would not believe in, tonight he gave her his most desperate fragment.

How she had walked back to his home with him without feeling the snow in her boots, she wasn't quite sure. But soon enough she had curled up in his guest bedroom, the ghost of his kiss still on her cheek. Come morning, she would leave and arrive at work long before he did. The nights that she stayed at his home were few and very far in between, but their pretense of Colonel and subordinate were necessary. So even though she yearned to do nothing more than open the door to his bedroom and let herself sink into his welcome arms, it was with incredible willpower that she tore herself away from his house and back to headquarters.

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Well, my first fanfiction, review and tell me what you think?  
And yeah, it was a bit short and doesn't really make a lot of sense, but I'll try to make the next one more coherent, if anyone wants to read more. (: Thanks.


	2. Mirror

_For R; because I could never see you, even with my eyes open. _

**  
MIRROR  
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"Here, Riza, I've bought a new shirt for you - it's blue, your favourite colour. It's for your eleventh birthday, that's sometime next week, isn't it?"

Amber eyes wide open, ten year old Riza nodded, it was the closest Father had gotten to guessing her birthday right since Mother had died. "Thank you, Father, but my favourite colour isn't-"

"Roy! Where is that boy? Even potential needs to be refined, you know." Watching as her father made his way up the stairs, she stepped out the front door with a sigh. Father had forgotten to buy the groceries in favour of the Alchemy books he'd brought home for Roy. Although Father and Roy could survive on crackers and milk, she most definitely couldn't. She'd decided long since Roy arrived that it must be one of those talents only Alchemists could possess.

Fourty five minutes later, she brought dinner up to Roy's room, she had already given Father his tray of food. Balancing Roy's tray and her own (she'd decided that as amusing as the dogs were to eat dinner with, at least Roy wouldn't try to steal her food) as she ascended the stairs, she nudged open the door to Roy's room with her foot.

"Roy? I've brought dinner, can I eat with you?"

He turned his eyes to her, but his gaze was distant, as if looking through her. He wasn't the only person in the household that she routinely got that same look from, Father rarely ever _looked _at her anymore. "Oh, hey Rize. Sure, but it's gotta be quick, your Father wants _another _essay on equivalent exchange written."

Settling down on the floor beside his bed, she watched as he shuffled through stacks of paper, flipping and scribbling an equation every once in a while, "Has Father seemed a bit.. I don't know, off to you lately, Roy?"

Barely raising his head so that she could only see the top of his raven hair, he replied, "I'm sure he's just busy with his work, Riza."

"But I'm his daughter." Still, Roy did not lift his head so that she could see his eyes.

"Well, you may be, but if you think about it Rize, it would be kind of selfish to demand his attention when he has such brilliant Alchemy concepts in his mind. I mean," he let her see his eyes, and it was then that she saw the emptiness in them, "for the greater good, right? In all truths, his research is much more important than just one person."

It wasn't like she had expected him to agree with her and think up a brilliant plan to make Father notice her again, but nonetheless, it was with bitterness that she pushed down the despair rising in her throat, "Right," she barely managed to croak, "Um, well, I'm done, I think I'll go back downstairs."

"Kay, could you close the door on your way out?" Roy said, turning his full attention back to the paper he was writing on.

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"Riza.. let me see Riza alone." Roy left her to be alone with her dying Father.

Kneeling before her Father, she let him clasp her hand in his large one. "Ri.. za. Take care.." she nodded, the tears dripping down her face. "I know Father, I will." She decided there was nothing more terrible than having to watch the light fade slowly out of her Father's eyes.

"..of the research. Take care.. of my research. Give it.. to Roy."

Letting her Father's hand drop bitterly back to the mattress, she let one last sob wrack her body. Just for a moment, she'd thought her father had been thinking of _her _instead of the research he'd written forever onto her back. Even his last words to her had been a command, asking her to bare her body to his student, who had always been more like the son he'd wanted than she ever had been his daughter.

"No." _No. _She should have known better than to believe Father might be thinking of her, but her sense of betrayal still flared in her.

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"Well, here's all your stuff, Rize, but where did you Father leave his research if not in his house?" Roy handed her her bags, rummaging through the last of her Father's drawers. There was only one thing her father had left his research on, and she knew where her Father had left his research, she knew all too well.

Since her Father had died a month ago, Roy had done nothing but search every inch of the house. He'd even had the nerve to rummage through her room one day when she was in town helping buying the groceries. Not once had he ever questioned whether she was all right.

Lately, she'd found herself thinking more and more that while Father's training might have given Roy the skills he needed, he had also embedded his own personality into Roy. Father had taken the dream out of Roy altogether.

"Hey, Riza. Here's one of your sweaters, it's your favourite one, isn't it? It's your favourite colour-blue."

Something in her snapped then, "My favourite colour is _red_! And despite what you and Father assumed I _hate _white chocolate. I _hate_ dancing and I _love_ archery! My birthday was last week and I need you to see me! I think your reasons for studying alchemy are all wrong, because all you want is glory, not to help people. Father was the one who always made you see just the research but he's gone now! He only ever saw his precious Alchemy in me but he's gone. He's gone but _I'm still here! I'm still here and I need you to see me. _I'm a person just like you are, and I just _need _you to see me. When you _look at me _you have to be able to _see me. _It should be just like a mirror, but instead, all you do is _see through me_._"_

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"You told me you wouldn't do this!" she yelled at him, her tears flowing carely down her cheeks. The despair in her throat was incredible. "You _swore _you'd use the Alchemy for the right reasons! That's why I gave it to you! You swore you would. But look what you're doing, tearing apart Ishbalans_, for what purpose?"_

"Riza-"

"Shut up, Roy, just shut up!"

Faster than she knew what was happening, she was pinned against the wall, his lips on hers and his hands pressing into her sides. Against her better judgement, she kissed him back. It was only after an eternity that he pulled back, slightly out of breath and his breath brushing her eyelashes. Bringing his mouth close to her left her, he tilted his head so that it rested against hers.

"I see you_, I see you_. Just trust me, I won't turn into your Father_. _When I look at you, at anybody, it is a mirror now. I see people just like me_, I see you, I see all of them."_

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There's the second chapter. Yes, Roy was a bit cruel to her in that first little part, but I can't honestly say that I think when Roy was young, and got praised so often for his talent, that he'd be a humble little boy that can see all truths. No one grows up that fast?

And I'm not sure if this was confusing to readers, but review and leave a comment. And please tell me if it was TOO incoherent, since I can't really judge, being the author.. Review, and much love. (: Oh yeah, this one was definitely longer than the first chapter.


	3. Kill

**KILL  
**_but I believe in whatever you do;  
change - taylor swift__  
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There were times Riza didn't know what they would do. They could negotiate and they could fight and they could kill, but no matter how many soldiers they killed and no matter how many hearts they destroyed when they killed those soldiers, these soldiers were simply _dispensible _to the higher ups. It wasn't like one life, or even a hundred thousand lives, of soldiers mattered to the homunculus. The homunculus were simply playing these human to carry out their will.

It was unfair and unjust how she and Roy and the rest of them had to carry this great burden on their shoulders alone. She was not that selfless and you could not ask her to be. She didn't enjoy killing, she never had, never would. How the world could simply ask her to shoot and kill to make her do exactly what it asked, she could not comprehend.

But as Roy crashed his lips onto hers, pressing her roughly against the backdoor of their little hideout, she realized that it didn't matter if the entire universe asked her to do its bidding. She was a selfish person, this she knew, because the only reason she was bearing this burden was to keep the eyes of this man her and only her.

_and I believe in you, although you never asked me to;  
you're still you - josh groban_  
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